The Biggest Ignored Population: Single & Divorced Parents – Why Is It Taboo?
In recent years, there has been significant progress in diversity and inclusion (D&I) initiatives within the workplace. Organizations are increasingly embracing race, gender, and sexual orientation as integral aspects of their D&I programs. But one major group has been consistently left out: single and divorced parents. This demographic forms a substantial portion of the workforce, yet they face ongoing stigma and exclusion.
In 2022, single-parent families represented 23% of U.S. households with children under 18. Despite this, single and divorced parents often find themselves marginalized at work, lacking the support they need to thrive. But why? And how can businesses better support this critical group?
Why Are Single and Divorced Parents Ignored?
Stigma and Bias
The stigma around single and divorced parents in the workplace stems from outdated social perceptions that view these individuals as less reliable, committed, or able to manage work-life balance effectively. The assumption is that their parental duties will interfere with job responsibilities, thus impacting productivity. This misconception can lead to exclusionary practices in hiring, promotions, and benefit offerings.
This stigma is deeply ingrained. In a society that often idolizes the nuclear family structure, single and divorced parents are left in the margins, labeled as “less ideal” employees. Single mothers, for instance, often face an additional gender bias, as women in caregiving roles are sometimes wrongly assumed to be less focused or capable.
Underrepresentation in Leadership
Single and divorced parents are often absent from leadership roles, which diminishes their ability to advocate for better workplace policies that address their needs. A report from LeanIn.Org found that women with children, particularly single mothers, are drastically underrepresented in leadership. This lack of representation means that the unique challenges faced by single and divorced parents often go unnoticed by those who design workplace policies, perpetuating the cycle of exclusion.
When single parents aren’t visible in leadership, their stories, needs, and concerns fail to reach decision-makers, which directly impacts the support they receive in terms of flexibility, benefits, and workplace culture.
Lack of Tailored Benefits
Many organizations offer benefits packages designed for employees who fit into traditional family models—married couples, dual-income households, or families with a stay-at-home parent. These packages often do not accommodate the realities of single or divorced parents who may need more flexible working hours, childcare support, and financial counseling.
For instance, flexible work schedules, which are critical for single parents juggling multiple roles, are only sometimes offered uniformly across organizations. According to a report from the International Labor Organization, nearly 56% of global workers lack access to flexible work options. Additionally, childcare benefits and parental leave often assume that there are two caregivers, leaving single parents with less support.
Cultural Silence
Why is it that so many employees feel comfortable talking about their pregnancy, parental leave, or even chronic illnesses but stay silent about their divorce? The answer lies in the deep-rooted cultural taboos surrounding divorce and single parenthood. Many employees feel they will be judged, discriminated against, or seen as less capable if they openly discuss their status as a single parent. This silence contributes to their ongoing exclusion from workplace diversity conversations.
A 2019 Pew Research study noted that only 15% of adults think single mothers do as good a job raising children as married couples, reflecting broader societal judgments. This bias often finds its way into the workplace, where divorced or single parents may feel pressure to prove their competency or dedication in ways that their peers do not.
Fear of Discrimination
Many single and divorced parents feel that revealing their family status will negatively impact their careers. According to research by the Workplace Fairness Organization, employees often hide their status as single or divorced parents out of fear of being passed over for promotions or denied opportunities. This is particularly prevalent in sectors that value long working hours or frequent travel, where employers may view single parents as less able to meet these demands.
Why Is It Taboo?
The taboo surrounding single and divorced parents comes from a mix of cultural norms, workplace policies, and deeply entrenched biases. For many years, the idealized version of the American family was a married couple with children. Divorce, single parenthood, or non-traditional family structures were often seen as societal failures. Despite cultural shifts, these biases still linger, particularly in the workplace.
Cultural Legacy of the “Nuclear Family”
The idea of the nuclear family—a married couple with children—has long been held as the societal ideal. The U.S. Census Bureau reported that 69% of children lived with two parents in 2020. Still, the other 31% live in different structures, including single-parent homes. Yet, companies often cling to traditional family values when designing their benefits, failing to acknowledge the diversity in modern family structures.
Bias in Benefits Design
Many benefits packages are built with dual-parent households in mind. Benefits like family health insurance often assume there’s another caregiver to pick up the slack, leaving single parents at a disadvantage. For example, childcare benefits are frequently underdeveloped or absent from many corporate policies, despite the fact that these benefits are critical for single parents who need help to rely on a partner for shared caregiving duties.
Workplace Perceptions of Competency
In the workplace, single and divorced parents are often perceived as less able to juggle demanding jobs due to their caregiving responsibilities. This assumption ignores the fact that single parents are frequently some of the most resilient and hardworking employees. A study by Harvard Business Review found that single parents consistently report higher levels of organizational commitment than their married peers.
Unconscious Bias
Even well-meaning managers may unconsciously pass over single parents for promotions or leadership roles, assuming they can’t handle the added responsibilities. These biases are often subtle but can have lasting effects on career progression and workplace inclusion.
How Can Companies Support Single and Divorced Parents?
- Flexible Work Policies
Organizations need to prioritize flexibility in their working hours and remote work options. Many single parents balance their work schedules with caregiving responsibilities, which makes rigid 9-5 schedules challenging to manage. Providing options for flexible working hours or remote work days will allow these employees to better balance their personal and professional lives.
- Tailored Benefits
Companies should offer benefits that cater to single and divorced parents. Childcare assistance, parental leave, and mental health resources are just a few ways employers can support their employees. Programs like SupportPay, which streamline financial caregiving responsibilities between divorced or separated parents, can also significantly reduce stress and improve productivity at work.
- Open Conversations and Representation
Encouraging open discussions about diverse family structures is critical to breaking down the stigma. By fostering a culture of inclusion and empathy, organizations can support single and divorced parents in feeling more accepted. Additionally, representation in leadership matters. Companies should make conscious efforts to promote single parents into leadership roles where they can serve as advocates for the needs of this community.
- Combating Bias
Organizations need to be aware of the unconscious biases that exist around single parents. By educating managers and HR professionals on these issues, they can begin to dismantle the systemic barriers that prevent single and divorced parents from advancing in their careers.
Single and divorced parents are a significant and hardworking part of the workforce. Ignoring their needs only perpetuates the challenges they face, which can lead to burnout and turnover. By providing inclusive benefits, promoting flexible work policies, and addressing the existing biases, companies can better support this essential group of employees.